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Slacken_Ties Archive

January 5th, 2008

HARRYHEARTSME

MOER FIC!!!!!!!

HI U GUYZ IM SOOOOOOOOOOOO SERRY THAT I DIDNT UPDART 4 AGGGGEEEESSS. OMG ENJEY!!!

CHAPTER 4:

but while he's thinking this a huge flyign bear rescues him, and sez 'i am ur 20th century boy also omg your not a flying bare ur morrissey! holy shit it's morrissey hol yshit can i get ur oautograph btw morrissey when did u turn into a bear i remember u were a fey homo in oversize flower shirtz and moz was like holy shit shut the fuck up you dumb fuck and morrissey kicked him in the balls and stole his lunch money and ran away and with the lunch money he bouth seaweet or w/evs stupid vegetarians eat

HARRYHEARTSME

CHEPTER SEX

coz wat pail did was so meen an nick rushd after him bt bcuz of hs giant bum he culn't keap up os he cot a cab but the cabbie was drunk n heran over a goat and the coat turnd out 2 b alxx reencarn8ed soo bb rushd over 2 the boat and cried "NOOOOOOOOO HOW COUL I LOOSE U 2X IN 1DAY/???//// O CREWL F8!" n nck cauuuuut up fineally an tryed 2 cunsoul bobbb & he sayd don't wory bb there r plentys of fishs in the see i mean goatse in the see and nick ran his fingres thru bobo's beared whil he cryed abotu alexxx but wile he wuz doin this he didnt sea brayn ferry sneakn up on them cause he was a wampire n he was ~secrit vaompire luverzz~ w/inn crutis but befor he culd sink he shiney tteeth in2 bobo's inviting neck he wuz atacked bi brayn eno omg he was like "NO BRAIN U HAV HURT 2 MANY PPL W/UR VAMPYR LIEZ I COMAND U 2 LEAV THIS HOTTTT PEICE OF ASS ALONE" but brain was like "NOFUCK OF AN D GO BAK 2 PRODUCING THAT LAME B& COSPLAY OR W/E" so brayn eno took his glistineng bnald hed in his hands & ucscrewed it 2 revel a GIANT MECHANICAL BRIAN!!!1111111 it was like that guy from teenage mutant ninja turtles with the brain stomach, bob thought! ao brayn and brain gott into an epik batle of vampirisms vs brians and while they fougt nick + bob ttly maed out!!!!1! nick was all BAWB UR BERD

HARRYHEARTSME

I LUV U

CHEPTER SVENEN

IS ALL SCRETHCY SHAVE IT PLS but bobo was lik NOOOO I AM LIKE SAMSON IN THE BIBBLE I NED IT 4 ~STRENTGHT~ AND ~BASE SKILLZZ~ I CANT SHAV IT OFF OR I WILL LOOSE THEM and nick got pised off and left pour bob alonne to put moisteurzer on he red scratcy face. in the mantime the epick wampire battel was ovR cos bRain and Brayn wer makin out it wuznt vry hot cuz their both rlly old soo nick wus like"ew wurt r u doin olg ppl rnt aloud 2 b gey thats grose" but brain sad "IM NOtgay YOU FAG i'm a NAZI vAMpiRWE" n he brreathd fire in obo's face ad his BREARD burnt off!!!1!! n bob wuz rnning round screamin "OMG ON MY POWERZ R GONE WUT HAV U DUN VAPMIRE !!!" n he tured in2 his tru frm of a pigtaled little blodn grrrl nadn nick sed 'OMG BOB UR SO HOT I LUVE LITTL GHIRLS I RED NABOKOV ALLLLLLL tHe TYME!" but bob run away from neck he wascared! nick watcked in horor as brina and baryn started makbing out agian! all of a suddan some droole driped from brain shinny wampire teeth on2 brayns mechanical brian causingalectrical shock! brain and brayn were electocuted to deoth! there vampie powers travled to nick thru an elctrical currant and

HARRYHEARTSME

(no subject)

MEANWHILE bob is still on the plane or did the plane already, crash either way BoBbbb isaliv e and hws' alll "hly shit ima live !111 han god curtss isnt her &then hje

seas this HUUUUUuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge dragon i mean this fucking dragon was huge it was like the size of a VOLVO butthe dragon wuz playign har2get an he ran away and bob chased thedragon and the dragon led him back to his home in ireland !! he arived just in tim e4 alexs funiral and pul was their and he was like 'WUT R WE Gunna du in franz w/out ALx? and apaul replyed we r gonna all become homos cus thats where the money is and i love sweet sweet cash i roll around in it all day n girl touch my hair but now only men cus i'm a dirty fag + 2 prove that paul grabbed boob and squeased his suculint npple an bbo was all "ow wtf u homo ull burn n hell & get aides & dye." n bbob ran out cryinf

HARRYHEARTSME

8888

nick becam a vampire! he ran off to find girl bobo cause he have a lust for bolod and now that bobo beard burned off he wold not sccrath him face suckn bobos neck! he left brain and brayn for daed cause they been elctroucted but he didnt notece that

CHUPTER 8

HARRYHEARTSME

CHEPTER NOINE

brain hand twhiched slitely on the ground maybe he still alyve! Bbob ran away frum nik bak 2 alexs funearl itwas o ver n vevr1 had left bt alx's body wus still their wating 2 b beried so he led nik 12 the body + apparintly nik was'nt very dissirning cos he ate alesx's flesh and ALEX CAME bak 2 life!!!!! n he wa sz a vampir ozmbie and bob ran aaaand scremed 'ON O WAT HAV I DONE THIS ISNOT TEH ALX I NEW!!!" n alx chetad on him w/vampre nik + thy had vampir/zomby sex and it wuz like this n bob vomitid + his vomet landid on brayn eno'z mekanickal brian * gave him nutrientz an d he cam back 2 life and sed HAY HAY I DUNT LIKE YR GIRLFRIEND which mede bbob sew angri that he wus liek f U U Breaaain! n he wuz cunna cut the enO brayen with a HUGE KNIFE but ten curtiz ion shoud up n sed WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII wile brandishin his wii (teh nintendo game not c0ck get ur mind outof the guttah!) and he

Figure 1.1: A Zombie

HARRYHEARTSME

(no subject)

CHUPTER 10

aim it at bobs hugh knife like he was playin the wii bowlin game and knoked it right out of bobos hand savving brayn eno! inn curtis secritly luved brayn whil he was hvaing ~secrit wampire luv afair~ w/brain fairy! now that brain fairy was dead he cold have brayn eno to his self! but while he steak claim on brayn bob said omg wtch out th fyling bare is bak!! +moz~ber decides he wasn't done wih curis & beets him up sum moar b ut en0))) stps him n sex 'HAY MOZ STUOP BETING UP MY BF CRUTIS IAANE' n moz wus lyke "HOLY SHIT IT'S BRAIN ENO i LUv Taking Tiger mtn by stragety!!!" bt eN000 isnt impresed cuz evry1 luv that ablum! mo2rizey relizes he wus bein a jrk and apoligisez 2 uCrurtiS aIN mnthen they make iojut bt zince mz iz a big grisly bar he cruches ien acindentely n en0 sez hu is driving? omg bear is driving~~ how can that be? so they hav an big americkan party and OMG WTF m0mus writez an entry on hiz jrnl bouit AMERIKKKA?? and HE POSTS PICS OF THE HUEG AMREICANA PAZTRY?? tehn he ANALYSEZ IT?????????? but tHEn theat guy idk his name oh wate bearmoz hAcKs LJ and deLeTES SEXY CUMUNITIES??? sew tehn p33n wents is liek "hay bearmoz i'm gonna post

~*~~~

HARRYHEARTSME

(no subject)

CHAPTER 11:

pics of my ugly cock on bearmoz_shot w/ a poster ov u 4rm teh bona drag period is taht okay" and bearmoz is liek OMG THERE'S A BEARMOZ CUMMUNITE I MUST DELETE IT CUZ I'M NOT A SEXXXUAL CREATURE WTF WTF sew bearmoz totes like deleters all of the cummunitez acdcept 4 oskar wilde cummunities b/c oskar is totes a sexy beast and sew like all these lj ppl r like "WTF Y R MY CUMMUNITIES ALL DELETED" and then bearmoz sez LAWL itZ LJ strikeTHRU 07! april fewlz! BUT IT'S NOT APRIL! n nick n alex rstill zombiyz n their annoyd mozbar b eleeted all teh xexy comz lyke teh 1 abut them so their lyke "MOZ BEER U BPUT THOSE COMS BCK OR WLL MAK U INTO A ZOMBIRE ORA VAMPIE OR W/E WE R!" N MOZ screamed ASL LOUD a she could 'Dear God pLease Help ME!!!!!!" but bfror Jeses culd

HARRYHEARTSME

(no subject)

sav him hiz kegz exlploded!!!!! n it got allover momuz's face n he was lik OH NO IS THIS WUT BUKKAKE IS LYKE???? I FEL SO VIVOLATED, O Y DID I EVR INFLCT THIS ON SUPPLE YOUNG ASIANZ!??" N HR RAN AWAY CRYN IN2 THA WOOZDZ N HOWRERD DEVOOTO WUZ THEIR N HOWRD SED

HARRYHEARTSME

(no subject)

CAN YOU HEAR THE DRUMS FERNANDOOOOOOOOOO

HARRYHEARTSME

CHUPTER FERTEEN

N MOMUZ REPLYD LOL is everyone in this community formerly of s_t? Suddenyl DINOZAURZ APPEERD bcuz howwie d wanned sum duyno nuggetz and he new that the olny way 2 get them wuz bi WISHYNG RL HARD. so he sed 2 mozmus "iF you WanT some DINO NUGGITS u haf to ~bLieve~ bcus htey r rly hard 2 come by." and momus started loling rly hrd and exclaymd "THATS WUT SHE SED" but howie d didnt get it but it DDNT MATTER CUZ 1 OF THE DINOSAURUSEZ HAD BEARMOZ ON THE BACK and he wuz like "IO HABE RETURNED FROM tHE HEAVENZ" n BareMOZ sed: Cum in2 mah kindum, MOMUZSAREUS

CUZ HE WUS A DINOSERA 2!!! + teh lizrdz n pterodactys & turtels and dinosars wer afrayd iof turnni in2 zombys so tehy 8 fanz fernidad bt tehy decided thy liked bob so they spited him up b4 theyre stuomach acidjuicez culd dizolve him and tehn AELXXX TIED UP BBOB NONCONSENTUALLY AND ST0LE HIS PAINTZ SO BOBOB WAS LIKE OMG MY PAINTS U BASTARD I H8 U 4EVER AND EVER and howie d started lolin cuz he had sandals on adn SOX ON 2 OMGO OMGMOGMO so he wuz liek STFU BOBOOBO U DON KNO HOW IT FEELS 2 B IN PAIN LIEK ME and bobob's tearz dropped on teh ground and liek a BEANSTALK GREW 4RM TEH GROUND OMG nd tehn sum guy named bernie buttlez came down the besnatlk nd he plaeyd a beutfiul tune on his 5 foot long cock (OMG CHICKEN NOT HIS WEINER U SICKOS) + bernie's luuxuisorious lox of shiney brwn hair bLiNdEd TEHM even THAT GUY W/ TEH EYEPATCH HOLY SHIT SO WE KNO HE WAZ POWERFUL an bernie waz liek "hoy shit thei r 2 meny cariturs

HARRYHEARTSME

(no subject)

CHAPTER 15:

in this stry`!!' vr1 in frenz iz ded xept 4 bowb n curtris n brayen r alredy ded n soo mozbarr lveavs n goz 2 rome wich is in portgual n bryaein ino jpyned him n uzing hiz supr smrt mechanicle brynanye 23 fix mozbrae's kegz!!! n momuz&deoto haxd SEXCKS!!! in th e woodes!!!! i gGuesS tht leacves barnie buztlez n bob zo mayby hthey make outy i guezz tat's not vry apeeling! tehn liek bobobo & bernie ride off on a bautirufl unicron taht leavs in rainbowz evry where 4 ppl 2 lisen 2 n disocver radoihed N TEHY LIVE HAPPILY EVR AFTER TEH END

SUGGESTIONS/CRITICISM/HELP WITH PARAGRAPH BREAKS WELCOME

HARRYHEARTSME

(no subject)

OMG I CUNT BLEIVE ITS OVER!!!!!

HARRYHEARTSME

THNZ BI

A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring. A gif with glittery words. It says There's a point in your life when you get tired of chasing everyone & trying to fix everything. But it's not giving up... It's realizing that you don't need certain people & the bullshit they bring.
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